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CONGRATULATIONS You’re Engaged!… Now what?!

Bride tip tuesday

April 2, 2019

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Best friends since 2004, we are a husband and wife photography duo living big city dreams as small town people.

Hey! We're Josh + Jeanette

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So my guess is one of the BEST THINGS EVER just happened in your life..

Your boo thang, your best friend just got down on one knee and asked you to spend forever with him and you started to either shed a tear or maybe ugly cry like most people do and said yes… Right?

That’s what I thought.

Wedding ring and sparkly toms

CONGRATULATIONS!!!! YOU’RE NOW ENGAGED! It is an amazing time filled with love and people wishing you well, but panic starts to set in and…..

 

NOW WHAT?!?!?!

 

Well, let me help you out. Here are the FIRST 5 THINGS you should do to help keep your mind at ease:

  1. Tell your family! Parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins- the whole gang. Trust me- it’s important.
  2. Talk to the parents and your brand new fiancé about a BUDGET.
  3. Pick a venue (A pro tip: pick a venue that has a full wedding coordinator named Kelcee and then you’ll have no stress at all. Yes totally just inserted a shameless plug haha)
  4. Pick colors, theme, whatever you want to call it. Better yet- decide how you want your wedding to FEEL!
  5. Decide what your non-negotiable items are about your special day for you and your fiancé.

So here is the breakdown and the WHY behind each of my recommendations what you should do first.

family formals : what to do when you get engaged

NUMBER ONE: TELL THE FAMILY!

I mean come on now, this one should be pretty obvious. Why should you tell them? well… they are just as excited as you are! This is a BIG moment that they will want to share with you. You might think it’s more important to you, but it is definitely a shared experience. The fact of the matter is you and your soon-to-be hubby are joining two families to become one- that’s a big stinking deal. The two of you will be making decisions that not only impact the two of you but both of your families. You will want to share the details because it will not only make you feel good, but makes your family feel included and special knowing what your vision is for your special day and your future. They CARE and LOVE you more than they will ever be able to put into words, so let them share their love with you by including them with this exciting news!

[personal story about telling the family: I mostly had to make phone calls to tell my family the news about getting married because everyone was traveling at the time- or at least appeared that way. My favorite reactions were my grandmother who squealed and squawked (literally) like a bird because she was so excited,  (I really wish I could do a voice over so you could hear what it sounded like and get the full experience haha) and my aunt’s who used every explicative she could think of (in a happy voice) plus created a few very unique renditions of curse words- I laughed so hard I might have piddled a little bit]

NUMBER TWO: DECIDE A BUDGET

Ugh… the money talk. Not necessarily my favorite conversation to have but ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY! Having a wedding and throwing a party are for serious major investments! From the venue to a dress, photographer, caterer, decor, and every detail in between it can get costly quick! Deciding the dollars will help with the guest list and how skinny you need to make it (do you really need to invite your best friend’s aunt who you met once at her 13th birthday dinner when you were in 7th grade?), how much you want to pay for the details, and will help make the most of every special moment and element. This budget will make you a pro at choosing what is important and make your day seem like perfection. I promise you Pinterest and crafting will become your best friend (or maybe your worst nightmare), and if it’s not a strength of yours, find a friend who is good at that or an event planner who specializes in those things! If you have neither, I promise I’ll be your friend and help you out in a hot second! (another shameless plug.. haha)

NUMBER THREE: FIND AND PICK A VENUE

This can be SUPER stressful and hard- not going to lie. However I know an awesome venue in Adamsville that offers full wedding weekends 😉

But anyway, finding a venue that honors what you want for your wedding is definitely up there on things you need to do! Finding a venue helps set your wedding date even if its 2 years ahead of time. This decision also can help get your vision of decorations in line, how many guests you can invite because of maximum capacity and how many they can seat in the room/banquet area, and potentially decide on caterers if they only allow their in house caterer as an option. So the search begins! Make a checklist of must haves in your reception space for sure, like candles because some venues don’t allow open flames because of the potential hazard to the space. NO BUENO! We ain’t got time to call the fire department before the whole place burns down.

NUMBER FOUR: PICK COLORS/THEME/FEEL, whatever you want to call it

Are you looking for elegance? What about rustic chic? How about comfort and welcoming? Well this can all be decided with the colors or theme that you pick. Or you can pick colors because you love them. Either way you want them to compliment each other well. Personally our wedding colors were all different purples, white and silver. Purple is Jordan’s FAVORITE color ever and I love silver and white is just classic and brings a certain elegance to any scheme just like an ivory or cream would do.

But the feel is based off of how you want your guests feel and experience at the wedding. Some want people to feel like they are going to a huge party, others want it to feel like a black tie event, but my favorites are the ones where the bride and groom want you to feel comfortable and just hanging out with a lot of friends. Those feels create moments! And for weddings WE ARE ALL ABOUT MOMENTS! 

Finally, NUMBER FIVE: WHAT ARE YOUR NON-NEGOTIABLES

I think non-negotiable items are best explained with an example. One of the non-negotiable things for Jordan was the only person who was going to marry us was his grandfather. He was going to be our officiant. No if’s, ands, or buts about it! One non-negotiable item for me was I wanted our wedding in my grandparents backyard because that was where I grew up, that place held a huge chunk of my heart and I wanted to share that with everyone. Both of those things happened for our day and I’m so glad we didn’t budge on those details because that is what made our day have so much more extra meaning to both of us. Those two things are what we look back on and make us smile a little more than if we had some random pastor marry us at a random church.

Another way to determine non-negotiables is to figure out what you are willing to spend a good chunk of change for. Do you LOVE cake? Maybe you need to spend some extra cash on the cake and not get the 6 disco balls for the dance floor. Ok so 6 disco balls might be a little aggressive, but you get my point. Are family photos and keepsakes important to you? Then spend more moolah on a photographer. That’s what we did. I mean OBVIOUSLY Josh and Jeanette were our picture taking God sends but they made sure to capture the day at every angle and get all the important moments that I love about our wedding day.

These non-negotiables are things that will make your heart sing! They will make your day just a little bit more than your wedding day but the PERFECT day! And once again will create memories that you can’t go back and have or recreate.

 

SO CONGRATULATIONS! You’re engaged and we couldn’t be happier for you. If you need help with number 3, let me know. I got a hook up that will treat your special day like it was one of our own. We would love to talk to you!

 

Until next time, this is the Sparrow Hill blog brought to you by Kelcee, the awesome sauce event planner at Sparrow Hill 😉

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